We recently shared our Bride Guide with you and now we want to make sure that the guys know that they aren't just wanted at the altar. All during the wedding planning process, there are opportunities to help the bride. A variety of the work will be negotiated by her, but fellas: don't absent yourselves from this chapter. You also have some stuff to take care of, and this pre-married period is an opportunity to show who you'll be as a husband.
Help with the Guest List
We'll start with the easiest task: helping create the guest list. You know your people and she knows hers. Combine them and compare them against your budget and vision and you're off to the races. Knowing the headcount and budget will allow you to plan well and will reduce stress. Reducing stress is a big deal.
Help her hire a Dream Team
Help your bride hire vendors who understand you, know what you want, are supportive and great at what they do. This is the team that will show up for you and bring their best, so do this together.
Be of Service to your Wife-to-Be
Take any items off her list that you can tackle. Doesn't matter how small the task, if getting it done matters to her, then shoulder in, grab your car keys or internet connection and knock it off of the to do list.
Weddings are stressful. Go ahead and prepare for some stress, coordination and crazy schedules as you start gearing up for the day. The closer you get to the day, the less time you'll have for planning. And doing even a short list of easy tasks will make you a winning groom.
Handle the Rehearsal Dinner
Not only is the rehearsal dinner your responsibility - according to the social contract we all signed - but it's actually one of the most memorable parts of the wedding weekend.
It's a party! Ask her best friend or yours, reach out to your classiest and most organized pals, and plan a dinner that is (1) a night off for her, and (2) a celebration of how you got here, and what's to come in your lives together.
Provide Emotional Support
Whether you know exactly what is wrong, or how it happened, or who caused it - BE THERE. Just listen and let her talk through it. Absorb the anxiety and release it for you both. Try to remind each other not to sweat the small stuff.
Help your Groomsmen
Whether you are renting or buying, have chosen suits or tuxes, prefer crazy socks or cowboy boots, YOU have to get your own wedding clothes pulled together and help your best man and groomsmen through this process. The bride and her bridesmaids will have their hands full with their own attire, so lean in and take this task on.
Try on your wedding attire
....THE MINUTE IT ARRIVES. You can thank us later, because this #protip will save you, guys.
We are living in a golden era of overnight, if not immediate, delivery, items arriving via drone, and rushed ordering. That does not mean that mistakes won't be made. Grooms: try on your wedding attire the minute you get it. Finding out that your shirt is two sizes too small on wedding day is not only going to cause acid reflux while you scramble to make things right, it may not be fixable. Try on every item as if that day was THE day and if you're satisfied, hang them up to keep them clean and you're good.
Remember that this is about your marriage...
... not your wedding. The wedding is months of planning executed on one day. Your marriage is for life, so relish the little moments, and let this time be one where you bond more, fall more in love and learn how to plan, solve problems together and make the day about you and your future.